July 25th, 1969

The Birth of my daughter. 

But, we have to start from the day before.  I was not feeling that great.  Through the latter part  of my pregnancy I was having dizzy spells. I did tell the doctor who told me that is not unusual. I felt like something was wrong but hey, I am not a doctor.

Billy said, I'm going to the bar for a few hours. I was not happy. I am never happy when he goes to the bar but he knows I am nervous being close to having a baby.  He said I'll be home by 10pm.  That rarely happened. 

But it did happen that night.   He came in and started making spaghetti because he was hungry. He tried to get me to eat, but I was not hungry, thankgoodness!  ( If you ate  soon before going into labor, they would not give you drugs.) So he ate, left a big mess in the kitchen and went to bed. 

Some information about giving birth back in the stone age.  You were completely shaved. No one else was allowed in the delivery room. 
You  were strapped down, arms and legs, like an animal. 
But you were given drugs...good drugs :D. 

I woke  at around 3ish, with some pressure pain, and I was bleeding a little. I thought this might be labor.

I woke Billy and waited, the pressure pain continued, I called the doctor. He said, this is your first one, it will be awhile, just keep track of labor pain, you have a long way to go.

So, I laid there waiting. 

I have to explain, the only information I had about water breaking was from my mother. Women would say, my water broke and soon after labor started etc. But my mother said, when her water broke it was like a dripping faucet. So that is what I expected.

About 4am I hear a loud SNAP and liquid is gushing out of me!  I think I am bleeding to death because I was bleeding lightly earlier. I can't speak because I think I must have only seconds to live with that much blood pouring out of me! 

I hit Billy, who is also wet from this avalanche of water. He goes to turn on the nightstand light and gets a little zap from it and the light blows out and he jumps out of bed and turns on the over head light.

We are both a little shell shocked. 

He is looking  down at me and I must have this look of horror on my face and I finally look at my body and sheets  and only see sticky-ish water instead of a river of blood.

We both have to get out of our wet clothes  and  I get hit with a pain that lands me on the sofa.  The pains are pretty intense, I know I bit Billys leg at one point. We timed the pains and called the doctor again who said, again, you have plenty of time blah blah. 

We had no car, so the time I went into labor decided which father would be home from work, that we would call. Billy's father was home so he was called. 

The pain is getting worse, I am starting to push!

Billy called the local ambulance. He kept dialing the number wrong so he runs out to go down there and get them, about 6 blocks away,
......leaving me alone on the sofa in labor. 

I hear Pop come in and the smile soon leaves his face. I am on the sofa in great pain and his son is nowhere around. I tell him where he went.  

 Pop said, we need to get you out of here. So between pains I run downstairs and get in the backseat of his car.  
He starts up the car just as Billy arrives with the ambulance. 
They drag me out of Pops car and put me in the ambulance. I lost my slippers at that point.

I am tested to see how dilated I am,  I hear the usual, its a first one there is plenty of time.  

We get to the hospital and I am put in a small room, with a big clock on the wall.  It is 4:50am
I am now starting to push more!

Someone comes in and wheels me to an elevator, I am pushing more, she tells me to stop. She tells me to breathe fast when I feel the urge to push. I breathe fast and push. I tell her I can't stop the pushing!

There is a man in the elevator with us and he is not happy to be there, I am pushing all over the place. 

We get to the delivery room, A nurse with very thick glasses, dry shaves me. My arms and legs are strapped down and I don't like it! 
I am telling them to unstrap me! At least my hands, unstrap my hands! But no. I tell them I want drugs!

GIVE ME DRUGS! 

I finally get them as I feel, what feels like a  bowling ball is coming out of me...I am..out.

I seem to come up from a dark place because a  nurse is slapping my face, telling me to stop it.
"stop it Rita, stop it Rita, stop it Rita"...I think I said,"what am I doing??" 
But I think, oh, now they want me awake, this is not over! I am going back to sleep till it's over. 
And I do.

Around 9am ish, I wake up, still in the delivery room. I look down and I am surprised to see a flat stomach and a nurse pressing on it. I can feel something is coming out.  

She stops and tells me I had a girl. I knew it was going to be a girl.  5 lbs 6oz. 19"long, A+blood.
 I ask if she is ok, she said she is fine.

She says something about I have an irregular heartbeat but I am ok, they were just watching it. I wonder if that is why they tried to wake me earlier. 

So I arrived at the hospital at 4:50am and Agnes was born at 5:10am. 20 minutes later. 

I am pretty sure my doctor did not arrive in time because she was being born when I passed out and he was not there. He said he was.

Some other information. 

When we got to the hospital, Billy said he wanted coffee, the ambulance guys told him, go get coffee, you  have plenty of time to wait around, its her first one. 
When he got back he was told he had a baby girl.  Most Italians want a son, but Billy was not like that, he was happy having a girl.

During labor she turned. They called it a breech block. I think, I would have had her at home if she didn't turn. 

I did not see her till the next day.  Everyone said she was beautiful, they took me in a wheelchair to finally see her! I was dizzy and had told the nurse, but I guess that was a normal thing because nothing was done about, again.

 Back then, it was a 3 day stay after you had a baby.  On the second day I fainted. Peggy and Billy were there, thankgoodness because Billy caught me.  I fainted in front of everyone in the visiting room on our floor. sigh

I had to stay an extra day because they took tests.  I was NOT happy.   I was anemic, that's why I was dizzy.
  I went in the hospital about 130 lbs and came out 105.  I must have had 15 lbs of water. I would not doubt it! 

Peggy came to take us home. She brought two outfits for me, one to wear home because none of my clothes fit, so I wore a stripped short jumper.  Agnes wore a blue dress with red and white flowers around the collar her Nana bought for her.

We stopped at Nana's house, so they could run down to the car and see her. I asked everyone, who does she look like and they all said....Billy.  Pissed me off..

So, that was the first 4 days of the life of Agnes. 

When we got home, I found out her Uncle Johnny had a fight with Joann  and was staying at our tiny apartment, on the sofa.  Just wonderful...

I like to read

 I don't know why I like to read. People think, if your parents read, you will read. That is not true because I know someone (Agnes) who LOVES to read and has read since she was a child, and NOT ONE of her children reads.  

My mother read books, mainly mystery's but also magazines and newspapers.  She liked the Perry Mason Mysteries and Agatha Christie books.

My dad would read certain books, like photography books, fish books, american indian books. He also read magazines and newspapers.  My older sisters read magazines and newspapers. My sister Barbara read books, but I don't remember Peggy read books. Me and Barbara liked the same books and loved to talk about them with each other...I miss her.

 My younger brothers did not read much of anything. My mother got the Hardy Boys books for Charlie which I don't think he read. I am not sure if I read them.

I liked the Dick and Jane books  our first reading books in first grade.   

I was very excited to get my library card! My mother took me to the library and it took me forever to decide what book to take out.  I took out, The Sun, of all things.  So I learned about the sun and I was late taking the book back and I am sure was talked to by my mother. I did not take a book out for a long time after that.

You could also buy books in Woolworths (5&10) store up the street.  A favorite book I got from there was, Eight Cousins.

I just loved that book. It is on ebay for just over $10. I might just get it one day. 

My mother also subscribed me to get 2 Nancy Drew books a month. I could NOT wait for them to arrive! I was  heartbroken when I read them all and my mother had to cancel it.

I also read magazines and newspapers.

Here I am reading, maybe The Star or Enquirer. I am pissed because I got out of the bath and I am in my pajamas and my hair is wet and my father wants to take my picture. I would not look at him. lol

sigh....I miss him.....

I liked Mystery and horror books. Then I found, Stephen King! And Peter Straub!  They were/are my favorites. I read some Sci-fi and ghost books.  True crime was a favorite too.

I like ancient civilizations and read books on those.  But Mr.King will always have a special place in my heart even if I did not care for the endings on some of his books.

I still read but much slower. I could read 2 books in a week. I would try to slow down, not read so fast but it was impossible back then. Now it could take months for me to finish a book. I am ok with that.

Many of the people I follow on YouTube tell stories about mysteries and murder.  A continuation of my reading.  

My grandchildren are not readers as I stated above. It is sad. When I read, I am not just reading the book. I am there in the room! I am watching what is going on.  In rare cases, like in the book, The Clan  of the Cave Bear, I was one of them!  They can take you away to different places. So much fun! 

So, reading has giving me, and continues to give me much joy in my life. :) 

I got lost - 1957

We moved from the Bronx to College Point, Queens in August, 1957.  We lived on 124th street, the school me and my cousin Brian were going to start was on 124th street. To get to school it was a straight walk for about a half mile.  

I was starting first grade, Brian second grade. When school started we would get a ride by my father or uncle.  At some point, we were going to be on the school bus.  And that's were the problem started.

I was excited to start the bus because at the end of the day, the school kids got to leave class earlier. I guess I never liked school.  So, the nun announces 1st bus children can leave. I looked around, was I a first bus child?  I waited. A little later, 2nd bus children leave. hmmm, I guess it's not me.  Next...the bell rang for class to end. Oh no, I don't think that's right.  I went outside and there was Brian. At the bus stop, crying. 

We missed the bus. He could not get on the bus because his mother told him he was NOT to get on the bus without ME. I made us miss the bus. We stood there for awhile,  everyone left, it is just us, so we try to go home the way  our dads drove us to school.  If we only walked straight down the blocks...but we didn't know. 

We started walking...

Around the block from our house my aunt and my mother are waiting for us to get off the school bus. It comes. We don't get off. They  talk to the school bus driver. We are not on the bus.  It was only when I became a parent that I realized  what a terrible moment that was for both of them.  They came home and called the school,  and woke their husbands (they worked nights) and called the cops.  Their only consolation was we were together.

Brian and I walked, we tried to find anything familiar.  We saw a house we thought we knew. It was a brick house with a big garden on the side and an old lady working in the garden. We ran up to her and asked her if she knew us. She  said no. We left.    Now..why didn't she ask us questions and realizing we were lost, hold us there and call the cops. That bothered me...but I think she did not understand English that well, not understanding what we were saying. 

At one point I started crying and Brian telling me it's ok, we will get home. 

So we walked...

Back at home, the cops are looking and my uncle in his car and my father in his were all searching the town for us. This was the age before THE internet and cell phones, so they would all stop at the house to see if there were updates.

In our journey, Brian spots a boy in his class. He asks the kid if he can take us to the school. He said he has to ask his mother, so we go to his house.  His mother said he could take us.  We get to the school.  The school crossing guard is there, it seems they asked her to stay in case we came back. 

She saw us, are you the lost kids? We say yes and just then, I see my father passing by in his car across the street, he sees us.  I start to run to him but the crossing guard holds me by my collar. A good thing, because I probably would have been hit by a car.

Next thing I remember me and Brian are having soup in the kitchen with our mothers standing around us and a cop walking in, very glad to see us home.

Brian and I talked about this alot. 

Years later, I would have lost dreams. I would get lost and I was always afraid of getting lost. The funny thing is, I never really associated those dreams with this event. I don't know why. lol   Anyway I have not had those dreams in years.

Here we are about  25-30 years ago. 

What movie traumatized you as a child.

 This was one of those questions on Facebook.  My daughter wrote, Children shouldn't play with dead things. LOL   Great title for a movie. 

Anyway, I started thinking about what movie traumatized me as a kid. And I thought and I though. I am still thinking. 

Not to say that a movie did not scare me as a kid,  some did, but not one that traumatized me. My sister would not take a shower again after watching the movie Psycho.  To me, that is traumatized. Or not sleeping without a night light...or the closet door opened or a clown hiding under your bed.

I have always loved scary movies/books.  I like to be scared.  But it does not do anything else to me. At some point the "scary" movies turned bloody/gory. they don't scare me at all, they annoy me more than anything. There is one exception though.  

The SAW movies.   That is a good collection of scary movies that also happen to be bloody.  I guess I like it because there is a story line and it is well acted. It also preys on fears many people have, like having a sharp object stuck in your eyes if you don't do something.....

I can remember one thing that did traumatize me that I saw on TV when I was a kid.  My father watched war documentary/series. Having only one TV we kids had to watch grown up TV.

 One was called, a World at War.  And it showed how the German concentration camps were liberated by the British and American troops. 

I saw the survivors, they were walking skeletons in rags.  Half burnt bodies in crematoriums,  naked bodies in piles. Piles of clothes, shoes taken from them. How they dug out huge holes and bull dozed bodies into them.  They had families, a home, a life and they suffered and now they are being  thrown in a hole.  How could people do that to other people. 

Lets not forget the Atomic bombing of Hiroshima and Nagsaki.  What horrors the survivors endured. The dead leaving a mark. People and things became shadows on walls and steps and the ground.  Like this.

As scary as some movies are and some can give me a good scare! which I love...but it is all make believe.

A girl I went to elementary school also posted on Facebook. She put the movie, Them. LOL  It was a story about Giant Ants.  

I remember that movie and I guess Giant Ants can traumatize someone. I don't see  how but I guess they can. Just like the Crawling eye and the Crawling hand. The Thing and so many more.

It is real life, what people can do to people/countries/ animals, that are traumatizing....to me. 

I'm cold, cold COLD!

 People would say, do you like being cold or warm? My daughter would say cold because you can  always get warm. There was a time when getting warm would be a problem for me. I don't know when it started. As a kid, I was normal. I would get hot in the summer and suffer with it like everyone else.

When I got married, I suffered in the heat too, but I think things started to change after I had Agnes.  Agnes was only a few weeks old when we went to Billy's friends house over night, we went in their pool and I remember having a hard time getting warm afterward.

It was a few years later when I noticed it more and more. I was coming home from the store on a hot day and I thought there was a bug crawling on my face, so I slapped my face. There was no bug but I was sweating. I remember being shocked because I was warm but I didn't feel hot enough to have sweat rolling down from my temple. 

And that's how it went for years. Yes, I would get warm or hot in the summer like everyone else. but it would not take long for me to cool off.  I remember we would close off the living room, put the air conditioner on and bring in the mattresses to sleep in there. At some point during the night I would wake up FROZEN, grab my quilt and go into the hot bedroom and curl up on the box spring, trying to get warm. I would spend the rest of the night in that hot box and not get hot. 

I always felt like my bones were copper coils and once they got cold it took ages to get warm.  So yes, I could feel the  warm/hot on my skin but it would not warm up my body. It is hard to explain.

Of course Billy was the opposite.  He suffered in the summer with the heat and in the winter he rarely wore a coat, flannel shirt and quilted vest were usually good for him. He also liked to sleep with the window cracked open in the winter.  Many arguments over that. He used to call me (sometimes) when he was on his way home so I could put the air on so he does not come home to a hot house.

He would be furious, at times, that I was cold when he was sweating in the heat! He took that picture of me. It is August. I am wearing a flannel night gown, a top sheet, a dark crocheted blanket(peaking out of the bottom right part of the quilt) covered with a quilt. He took the picture and then woke me yelling, "how can you SLEEP bundled up in THIS HEAT, I am SWEATING!" 

So, yes I might go to bed warm, but I had a very small fan on my night table. I would have it on, but NOT blowing on me. That little bit of air circulation would cool me off, that's all I needed.

So that's how things were, but as I got older around the menopausal age, I did not suffer with the cold as much.  Once in awhile I still get cold to the bone. I went to a Met games on a dreary, drizzly, the first day of spring day and was cold for hours afterwards. 

I wrote this, because I had one of the days, today. I could not get warm. I had to go outside to get warm but I was still cold  when I came inside. So I took a nice HOT shower and I am finally warm. lol 

Since I have also suffered with hot flashes...I have to say, it is horrible to be HOT and not able to cool off.  So I try not to complain too much about the cold house..but sometimes..I have to. LOL

The Beatles Final part

 The Beatles keep turning out hit singles. Hit Albums and even movies. I must say, I was not a fan of their movies. I don't recall even going to one of them. 

I have always said, there has never been a band as popular as The Beatles.  Not only did we love their songs, so did our parents.  Many singers of the time, from my parents era, would sing Beatle songs.  Dean Martin, Andy Williams, Frank Sinatra sang their songs just to name a few.  

Here is a list of Beatle songs. Amazing. 

We followed the goings on of the Beatles in Magazines and TV.  We found out John was married and had a son! But soon the other Beatles married and divorced. John said they were more popular than Jesus and caused a whole big uproar.  I knew what he meant but apparently many did not and burned their records. 

Their music style grew and changed and became psychedelic. Their hair was long they all had beards and mustaches.

And then the arguments and threats. Finally it was the end. They were splitting up.

One of the last pictures of them as The Beatles.

The end of an Era.

They went on leading their own groups, their own lives. One of them might make a special appearance in another's group. 

On December 8th, 1980 my mother called. Are you watching the news? I said no. She said put the news on, she would not tell me why.  

John Lennon was murdered in front of the Dekota Apt. building where he lived. My mother knew I would be upset and couldn't tell me.  Very Sad.   Then George died of cancer.  I was going to marry George when I was a beatlemaniac. sigh

Paul just released a new album, frankly, I think he should retire now. His album sucked.  But that's just my opinion.  Ringo is in a band with his son, I believe. I never bought any of their records after the beatles. 

I will always be a

BEATLEMANIC

The Beatles, Part 1

 So, we were a nation mourning the loss of our President. Old Johnson was the President now, with Lady Bird and their 2 daughters. The Vietnam war (its not a war, it's a police action) is in the news more often and of course  we gotta watch those Russians! 

I have a British penpal, Cheryl. She was telling me about a group in England called, The Beatles, have I heard of them? No. She sends me some magazines about them. Boy, do I WISH I had those now!  I think they look weird. They have long hair.

To think we thought this was long hair. But the buzz cut was still popular from the '50s or the slick back Elvis hair was still popular too, so this was quite different from those.

In 1962 the Beatles are getting on the Charts in England and by 1963 they had hits on the British Record charts.  In the USA, the record, I want to hold your hand, became Number 1 in January, 1963.

I want to hold your hand

Yes, I bought it.  I loved it, the music was so different.  My dad wanted to hear what they sounded like. He was not impressed with the group. It is not one of my favorite Beatles songs either, but it was the first song by the Beatles that I  ever heard. 

This was the start of  Beatlemania. This is in England, but it was the same here. 

The Beatles came to America, arriving at LaGuardia  Airport, New York, on February 7th, 1964. My 13th birthday. Did I feel special. 

Many girls/kids were cutting school and going to the airport. I was in the 7th grade.  As much as I wanted to be there, I never even thought of cutting school. I had my transistor radio and ear plug, we only had one ear plug, not two plugs for the ears...for some reason.  So I listened when I could in class, of the happenings at the airport. 

(See those pocketbooks hanging over the sign? I had both of them.) 

I had tons of Beatle cards and magazines.  We were always at Woolworths buying records. 

The boys started getting Beatle haircuts and wearing boots with heels. 

There was even a hit song, called, We love you Beatles. Really dumb record and yes, I had it.

We love you, Beatles, oh yes we do

So, this was the start of Beatlemania and The British envasion.

Next part coming up