Covid.....again

 Two days after Thanksgiving I got sick. Before that, Agnes was sick, I guess she thought she had a head cold, but she probably had covid, but didn't test herself.

I started with head congestion, then a high fever, then a cough. I had a little stomach problems but only for one day and not bad like the last covid.

I was mainly sick for about 9 days, 3 days being the worst because of the fever. I got up to almost 103.  

I am much better now and my only complaint is my usual one. Being Tired.

About 3 days after I was sick, Liam came down with covid. He had congestion, fever, cough and chills.  He was better in about a week. 

I hope that's my last covid sickness.

eating at our house in the 1950's/60s

 I don't remember any dinner's in the Bronx. I guess I was too young, plus I did not care much for food. I said food, not snacks. lol

The kitchen was small in the house in Queens.  You could fit four people at the kitchen table. It would be me and Charlie in the kitchen, (Tommy being too young at this point) My mother would serve my father in the living room. Peg or Barb would be in the kitchen and one in the livingroom or both. I guess it depended on what was on TV. Mom would eat in the kitchen. I never saw her eat in the living room.

We never ate out for dinner. My father did not like to eat out, so my mother cooked 365 days a week. Even in later years when my married sister would take my mother out to eat, mom still had to cook for my father and whatever kids were still home.

Breakfast was cereal for the kids, my father always had eggs, usually with home fries and or ham.

Lunch was P&J or P&B (butter) sandwich, or grilled cheese.

We had no TV dinners or take out food. (or if we did, it was rarely)

In the 60's when my sisters were married and came for dinner with their husbands, and children, we still managed for everyone to have a seat...somewhere. lol

There were no table settings,  you got your plate with utensils, that's it. Mom usually filled the plate and it was brought in the living room by one of us.

It was the women in the kitchen and the men in the livingroom.

Those are very warm memories for me.

This was before both sisters moved away, got divorced, one lost a child, one became an alcoholic.

...In the later 1970's when their house went on fire and they stayed with me for 9 months. I told them we order pizza every Friday for dinner and they said that is fine with us. 

When they moved back home, they continued to order pizza once a week, so my mother got a break from cooking!

The snob around the corner.

 My friend Nancy liked a boy a block away, because of that she would do anything to be near him. She would baby sit his little brother a lot. About 1963, I was 12, she was taking the little brother to see Santa in a department store in Flushing. I forget which store. I was taking my little brother, Tom who was 4 with us.

We walked to Nancy's house and from there the half block to the boys house.  The mother came to the door with her little son. She looked at Tommy. She said you are taking him like that?  I looked at Tommy, so did Nancy, and I said yes. I had no idea what she was talking about.  We left. As we are walking away, Nancy said I can't believe she said that. I said, me too. Still not a clue in my head. 

On the bus to Flushing,  I was looking at her son and Tommy. It finally hit me what she was talking about.  Her son was immaculate, his pants, jacket, shoes, hair cut. And then there was Tommy.

He was wearing my brother Charlie's hand me down brown leather hat, lined with fur,  that you could tie the ears up. It was so old it was peeling  and fading like leather does when its old. His pants were patched at the knees and his jacket was an old cloth jacket that had a few stains, it saw better days but it was warm.

I would think nothing about how he was dressed because we all wore hand me downs and the only time you got new clothes is if nothing fit.

So, she thought Tommy looked too cruddy to go see Santa. I was thankful Tommy did not understand any of this.

I would never go to that house again and I think Nancy didn't go there as much either.

Death

 It's a subject no one likes to talk about even though it will happen to every one of us. How old were you when you realized your family and you, will die one day?

I was 6 when my cousin Jimmy boy died. I was told he was in heaven and I asked does that mean I won't see him any more? I was told yes.  I thought about him for a long time, I wondered if he missed his mother....

I was raised Catholic so if I made it to heaven I would grow wings and float on a cloud, maybe play a harp and be with Jesus. Frankly, I thought that sounded pretty boring.

My thoughts on the matter now that I am old are a lot different than when I was a kid. And I still don't have all the answers, just my opinion and my belief, right now. It could still change. :) 

I think right after you die, you can still see and visit loved ones, but most won't know you are there. I don't think it is so easy to communicate with the living. I say that because my sister and I had a pact to contact the other but I have received nothing from her. A trip to a psychic a few years after she died, told me, your sister is calling you a BITCH because YOU are not picking up the messages she is sending YOU! Yes, she would call me a bitch. lol

We are all a vibration and death is just a different frequency, maybe a faster vibration.

In general, I do believe we are here for a purpose, we asked to be here. I believe in reincarnation. Whether you HAVE to come back or CHOOSE to come back...I am not sure. Many say the choice is yours.

There is always someone you know who will come to greet you  family, friend, pet or Jesus. Some say the first choice you have to make is to go to the light or not. Some go, some wait. 

That is what I believe and what comes after that is up in the air. 

I know I am (we are) a spark of energy from Source (god) that never blinks out. I am inside this body to experience life on a physical plane and when I die (shrug out of this body) I go back home with my family and friends. 

So try not to worry, don't let fear into your life. I know, I know, it's not easy, especially in these times. But try the best you can. It's only negative energy and it's good to raise your vibration for a healthier life.

New shots 6/18/22

My B12 lvl was still very low. So I have to give myself a shot once a month and take B12 vitamins I do this for 6 months. 

I am not going to complain. When I had to do it every week I thought...geez..I wish I only had to do this once  a month or once every 3 months.

 Any way, so many people have much much worse things to do, this is baby stuff.

This was also my wellness visit where you answer a bunch of questions and do a memory test which I passed with no problem since they seem to give you the same one every year.

Our weather has been HOT and HUMID with very little rain. There are NO storms, so I can deal with everything else. :)

Education

 We did not have a lot of that in my family. On my father's side, his mother, my Grandma Maude Griffin, could not read or write. I was told, when she would visit and my sister's wanted her to read the comic for them, she would make up a story as she went along. She would use an X to sign her name. I just assume the rest of her family was the same.  I think the men had some kind of education. I guess they could read and write since it was never said that they could not.

On my mothers side, I think they were more educated. They had some education. They could read and write.  My mother went to a Catholic grammer school. This is part is a little hazy...she did go to a catholic high school. At some point her mother could not afford to send her, so that was the end of her education. She also had appendicitis and she may have been held back because of that, she missed a lot of school because of it.

My father  went to a catholic grammer school and might have had a little high school education. He joined the CCC's  (Civilian Conservative Corp) at 17.

Both parents could help us with our homework.  I had to go to my father for math help as my mother was not good with math.

My siblings and I were not forced to finish high school. Back then, you didn't have to finish to succeed in most jobs. I know a few friends who had good jobs and later had to lie and say they graduated to keep their jobs that now required a diploma.

So most of  us quit school at 16 and went to work. Barbara was the only and first person in our family to finish High School.  Back then, usually, a women worked until she had a baby, then she stayed at home, Yes, there were exceptions. It was the 1960s and things were changing.

I quit at 16 and got a job but went back and got my diploma at 22 or 23. Agnes's father did not finish High school and I didn't want Agnes to say, why do I have to finish when neither one of you did?  

A few of us had college classes but none of us were college graduates.  The granddaughter took care of that ❤❤❤

Well, she took care of that a few years ago. lol

video talk

 Yesterday I got to facetime with my brother, Charlie. We have been trying to do that for about a year and I finally managed it yesterday. I don't exactly know how I did it, but I did. 

Since we are only 14 months apart, I was very close with my brother.  He was a very kind, sweet boy. We shared a room till I was 10. 

Everything was good till Charlie started to drink when he was a teen and it just got worse as the years went by. He married a drug addict, the marriage lasted a few years.

He could not hold a job for long. When my parents died he lived on and off with me. He rehabbed a few times. He would be good for a period of time but when he fell off the wagon he was horrible and we all had to deal with his problems. Which was one reason I left New York. I did not want to deal with him any more. I always took him back because I could not let him live on the street. 

I have not seen him since 2000. He made his life with someone he met in a newspaper ad and lived with her and her kids.

So, anyway, we finally "saw" each other on video chat!  It was fun.  He is in a rehab/nursing home and he was showing me around his room and I was showing him around my room.  We only did it once, but I hope we do it again soon.

I wish he had a better life, that he could be in a better place now that he is heading towards the last stretch. He knows he is there because of his choices. I just wish this life was easier for him. Maybe the next one will.

Injection

 So I went to the doctor the first week in March and found out my vitamin B12 level was very, very low. Infact my Dr. said she has never had a patient with a lvl this low.  So, to build me up I could :

1. Come in every Tuesday for the next 5 (doctor gave me a shot in the office or it would have been 6) weeks for an injection.

2. Do it myself

3. Get a friend/relative to do it.

I did not want to go to the doctor every week and I did not want a friend of ours to do it,  So, I said I would try, I think I could do it. The doctor said if I really couldn't do it, to come in, someone would give it to you.

I watched video's on Youtube on how to do it since the only thing the doctor told me was...not to go in on an angle and it is not that hard.

On Tuesday, the hardest part was getting all the medication into the needle. That took a few tries.  I am not afraid of needles, but when I get a shot, I have to look away, I don't like to watch. So this was a little challenging. But I did a great job. 

On Tuesday I will inject on my other leg.  I do this 4 more weeks and go back to her in June for lab and I will be probably be put on B12 pills.

I am very proud that I did do this, I still can't believe I did it. lol

It was also appropriate that I did it on March 15th, the Ides of March. You should know what day this is, if not look it up. 

So, if anyone needs an injection, I can do it for you :) 

When I got Covid

 

I thought I would write  about  covid here so I would not forget what hell I went through. 

Soon after Christmas I started with the following illnesses. Headaches, cough, stomach  pains and chills with a low grade fever.  The chills lasted 2 days every thing else at least 5 days. Daughter was sick before and during this also. 

Jan. 4th I could not taste or smell and tested positive. I guess you could say it is like the worst flu you ever had x2. Still, stomach problems. I see commercials for colon cleanse...that's what I got, thanks to the virus. It was awful. I had the sweats and was getting weaker by the day. I did not eat for days. I knew I had to, to get better. 

Sometimes I only had energy to take a shower every few days. I almost fainted in the shower, so taking one was always an adventure.

Even though I can not taste or smell I tried to eat. Toast tasted like cardboard. Tea tasted like warm water and I am not sure  if I will ever be able to eat a McDonalds again which tasted like sand with bigger bits of sand that I think was fat. 

I started to Hallucinate. I saw a cat 4 times. 2xs in my bedroom, once in the dining room and once in the hall. I also had this...hallucination...or dream once that was weird about a robot/human.  

I thought I might have to tell Agnes I need to go to the hospital. But I never said it, I did not want to go there. But I needed to eat or I would end up there. I spent a better part of 2 weeks in bed.

I also had dry nasal passage, I had scabs way up in the nostril, you have no idea how painful that can be.  Blowing your nose is a horror story. I would pull the scabs out so I could breathe.

Of course with this, I got a UTI, because...that's how I roll. That was it's own horror story. And I also got Shingles! on my back which was painful in its self. sigh. 

I could smell and taste peanut butter. I had peanut butter crackers so I would eat that.  I also decided to try sweet potatoes. I had to ask Bill to open the can for me because I did not have enough strength. I could taste them! I think they saved me. I ate them twice a day. They are loaded with good stuff. 

At one point I felt like a turned the corner and was not going to die. Yes, for about 2-3 days I thought this would kill me and I would not have been unhappy. 

Then even though I still could not taste or smell, the texture of the food wasn't as bad and I could eat more gaining back some strength.

Around the 17th I started feel better, I could shower and do my wash in one day! Getting stronger!

Today is the 23rd and I still get tired at times, I still can't smell or taste most foods. My throat has...a coating, still. But not bad. My back still gets sore. I would say I am 80% recovered.

I lost 13 pounds!

I do hope to never get this again! I do hope I get my taste and smell back!